Green flags and red flags

What to know

1. Know the green flags. Healthy relationships depend on healthy communication, healthy boundaries, mutual respect and support for each other, checking in on each other's needs while giving each other space and privacy.
2. Test the boundary flag. A healthy partner respects a boundary once you've said it, and you can ask "Is this okay?" without a fight.
3. Watch for control. Most abusive relationships share one feature: one partner tries to gain power and control over the other.
4. Know the emotional red flags: name-calling, telling you what to wear, keeping you from friends or family, blaming you for their behavior, accusing you of cheating, constant checking in or excessive texting, threatening to hurt themselves if you leave.
5. Know the money red flags: tracking what you buy, putting your paycheck where you can't reach it, limiting your work hours, or using your Social Security number for credit without permission.
6. Know the digital red flags: telling you who to follow, tracking you on social media, pressuring you for passwords or explicit photos, going through your phone, or using spyware or GPS to monitor you. You never have to share your passwords or send explicit pictures.
7. Take even one or two red flags seriously; that alone can be a sign abuse may be present.
8. Talk to someone. For young people: love is respect, 866-331-9474, or text LOVEIS to 22522. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.